Smiles for Mrs. Hansen

   "Takk for Maten", Mrs. Hansen

                    By Cean Scott Molinari

 

 

I met the Norwegians long ago and in a different time. My family's respect for the Hansen's began in the 1940's. Evelina Hansen became my best friend and remains so to this day. Mrs. Hansen and her older daughter, Sonya had careers. That was rarely seen in the 40"s and 50's. Their example would fortify me the rest of my life. Dagny and Hans Hansen operated a summer hotel and then restaurant in Oakland, New Jersey. It was a pretty drive from New York City, most importantly Brooklyn. The hotel guests were a constant delight to us as children. All had remarkable stories to tell; and did.

 

 

The Hansen house had so many bedrooms that they were numbered.  Evelyn "Evelina" carries on that Hansen tradition.  

Nowadays the phrase "It takes a village to raise a child" has become an overused and outdated liberal notion. The Hansen's and my parents never said those words. They did instinctively practice them.  This was a time before orchestrated and scheduled children's activities.  After chores were done we were free to come and go. We were always welcome in each other's home.  We were expected to behave well; so we did. We were expected to be independent but thoughtful in our choices; so we were.  Mrs. Hansen instilled this without ever raising her voice. She taught us by rigorous example.

The lessons we learned from her:

• Decorum - trust yourself to behave well in all circumstances.
• Wear leather shoes - polished.
• Never be trendy - wear natural fibers.
• Always help when you can.
• Never overcook fish.
• Presentation is the jewel in the crown.
• Do not date a boy who has a cigarette pack rolled up in his t-short sleeve.
• Mistakes are the basis of learning.
• Don't ask others to do what you won't.
• Learn every aspect of your chosen work.
• Never let your soup stock come to a boil.
• Cardamom is a food group.
• Always accept a compliment with grace.
• Stand up straight.

I learned that Mrs. Hansen has left us. I honored her memory by gathering all the wonderful necessities for a 9 year old girls birthday tea party. This child's mother has cancer. She is from the Ukraine and has no family here. She had run out if energy and ideas.

 

When my husband Terry delivered the complete party to them their faces were glowing. I had done what Mrs. Hansen demonstrated so very often. Help when you can.

 

I went home, fixed a "Shirley Temple", and toasted "Skoal" to Mrs. Hansen.

 

Dagny Hansen

1908-2014